Discovery

Shakespeare does not appreciate the wonder and magic to be found in a cup of coffee.

It must be a golden retriever thing.

(See what I meant about the picture resizing thing? Still pissin’ me off.)

Filed under: Family, Shakespeare

i iz in ur panteez drwr

i iz 2day gest poet. shh. don tell janiebellezzz!!!1!!11!!!

i iz in ur panteez drwr
eetin up ur panteez,
i iz in ur cubbard drwr
eetin up ur green teaz.

i iz under cofee tablez
chewin on da legz
i iz in da fridgidator
drinkin fwum da kegz.

i iz eetin doggy bonz
n beggin 4 da treetz,
i iz playin fechaball
n walkin down da streetz.

i iz in ur bak yard
poopin on da grass,
i iz rite behind u,
sniffin up ur a$$.

i iz in ur morning fase
messsin up ur hair,
n sneakin in da ofise
humpin’ on da chare!

shakespeare da bard dawg

likkz 4 u fwum mmeeeeeezzzzzz!!!

Filed under: Guest Post, Humor, Poetry, Shakespeare

Shakespeare’s Birthday

<—-Not this guy.

This guy. —>

He’s one today.

We didn’t meet him and bring him home until September, but he was born on July 15, 2006.

Filed under: Family, Shakespeare

Shakespeare’s New Trick

I love my dog. I really do. He’s beautiful, and friendly, and playful, and smart.

He’s got a new trick that he’s learned all by himself over the last week or two. When his water dish or his food dish (a matching set, he’s tasteful that way) gets empty, he picks it up and brings it to me.

Now this is not only wonderfully intelligent, it’s also rather convenient for me. I know that if I forget to check his bowl for an hour or two, he’ll let me know if he runs dry.

I love my dog.

As with all things in life however, there is apparently a down side…

Filed under: Corporal Kate, Family, Humor, Rants, Romance, Shakespeare

Scarin’ The Hell Out Of Me

Shakespeare is so lucky I love him!

I’m not really sure exactly what it was.  I was lying in bed asleep like most normal people at 7 AM, minding my own damned business and dreaming of something very sensual involving Kate.  I could feel her breath on my face as she kissed me, her hand between my thighs, I was panting heavily, the works.  It was a wonderful dream.

For whatever reason, my eyes opened.  I let out quite the little scream followed by a long string of very unladylike words that mostly involved four letters.

There aren’t many worse ways to wake up than opening your eyes to find a golden retriever nose about two centimeters away from your own.  He wasn’t licking my face or anything, just staring at me watching me sleep, I guess.

I feel kinda bad because I think I scared him as much as he scared me.  As it turns out, the breath I was feeling on my face was his, the hand between my thighs was mine, and Kate was nowhere to be found.

Bummer.

Filed under: Corporal Kate, Humor, Shakespeare

Shakespeare Has Something To Say

So the pup is driving me nuts while I surf. I suppose it’s only fair to let him say something.

His eloquence can be enjoyed below the fold.

Filed under: Humor, Shakespeare

Thirty Four Pounds

Shakespeare went to the vet today.

Filed under: Shakespeare

Thirty Four Pounds

Shakespeare went to the vet today.

Yep, we got him in September, and he was like 12 pounds. Now he’s 34. He got his last distemper/parvo vaccine for a year, and we made an appointment for January to uh…. y’know.

(He’s reading over my shoulder so I don’t want to mention the whole N-U-T-L-E-S-S thing. Good thing he can’t spell.)

🙂

Filed under: Shakespeare

Shakespeare Steals Home

I’d give anything to have had this on video…

Filed under: Humor, Shakespeare

Open Thread

We should probably do this every now and again. Go ahead, say whatever you want (just go easy on the f bomb, if you would). Blog whore, post funny links, spout off, whatever.

Filed under: Family, Humor, Shakespeare, Time Sink