UDreamOfJanie

Dream a Little Dream of Me.

Birthday Kiss

So I’ve been up all night. I’m tired, but not cranky. I’m giddy. I’m happy. I’m silly. I’m horny. (YES AGAIN!)

Kate and I took a bit of a break a little bit ago from blogging, and reading, and general birthday silliness to catch a small cat-nap.

(Kate must own stock in Victoria’s Secret, btw.)

The door bell rings. Kate and I wind up in a very loud wrestling match to fight for the door.

Now, we’re not exactly dressed. Not naked, but not dressed. I’m in a new little white lacy teddy, and Kate’s in a new matching red one. (Both of which are birthday presents for me.)

Look, it’s our house. Don’t like how we answer the door? Don’t ring the doorbell.

Anyways, Kate cheats and uses some Marine Corps Kung Fu Judo Ninja move to get to the door first, and while I’m sprawled on the floor, she answers it.

It’s a woman’s voice. I didn’t quite catch what she said, other than “birthday”.

Kate turns to me and says, “It’s for you.” with this raised eyebrow smirk thing going on.

I get up and go to the door. It’s the neighbor, M. Remember her? The one with the husband that has issues with naked mud wrestling girls? Yep, it’s her.

I push the storm door open, and step aside to let her in.

I don’t even get to say anything more than “hi”.

She gives Kate a look over her shoulder, and then when I look over at Kate, M. plants a big one on me. A big, wet, needy, insistant one, full of tongue and lips and teeth.

Bummer. I hate when that happens… not.

Her hands find my waist, then my hips, then my ass, and she pulls me in tight for just a moment.

Then she breaks off, takes a step back, puts one finger on my lips, and says softly, “Happy Birthday, I’ll be back later.”

Then she just walks out.

I love my birthday.

Filed under: About, Amazing Grace, Corporal Kate, Friends, Humor

8 Responses

  1. Infophile says:

    Happy Birthday, Janie! Now that you’ve reach the age of consent, all that’s left is that pesky lack of a physical body (still working on a solution there) stopping me from properly giving you my present (as if there’s anything “proper” about what I have in mind).

    In the meantime, I’ve made a deal with some trans-reality smugglers that should allow it to get to you. So, if you start getting certain “sensations” once you’re in bed tonight, you know who to thank.

    PS. The safe word is “Swordfish”

  2. JanieBelle says:

    Thank you Infophile.

    Turns out I have a work-around in mind about that whole meat sack thing.

    Stay tuned.

    Oh, and in North Carolina, I reached the age of consent two years ago. It’s 16 here.

    Strange how I could spend two years legally being able to have sex, but not looking at pictures of sex.

    Does that make a bit of sense to anyone?

    Anyways, you needn’t have waited.

    I’m sure I’ll be sending my thanks along tomorrow.

    Oh and good idea with the safe word. I wouldn’t want those smugglers to accidentally get hurt.

    😉

  3. Deacon Barry says:

    Happy Birthday JanieBelle from Scotland. Lang may yer lum reek!

  4. JanieBelle says:

    Wi’ ither folks coal!

    Thank you, Deacon Barry.

    Birthday Kisses to you both.

  5. Pi Guy says:

    Actually, I’ve always wondered why it’s illegal to pay a someone to have sex while, OTOH, if you pay them, have sex, videotape it, and post it on the internet where you can money off the subscriptions and ads, well, it’s perfectly okay.

    The arbitrainess of age(s) of consent is baffling to me. You’re an “adult” at 16 when it comes to driving but 21 for drinking which is weird if you think about which of those really takes the most responisibility. You’re an adult at 12 or 13 if you’re vying for the kids’ meals at restaurant but somewhere between 15 and 18 to consent to having sex. At 18, you can be blown up for your country by an IED in Baghdad but you can’t drive or lease a rented car in Baltimore.

    *brain hurts*

  6. JanieBelle says:

    Actually, I’ve always wondered why it’s illegal to pay a someone to have sex while, OTOH, if you pay them, have sex, videotape it, and post it on the internet where you can money off the subscriptions and ads, well, it’s perfectly okay.

    Y’know, that angle hadn’t even occurred to me.

    You’re right of course, none of this makes any sense at all.

    *brain also hurts*

  7. JanieBelle says:

    Oh, and I know I haven’t blogged about it yet, but stay tuned:

    The birthday kiss turned into birthday dinner, birthday dessert, birthday bath, and birthday sleepover.

    I love my birthday.

  8. JanieBelle says:

    Oh, and Infophile’s smugglers?

    Last I saw them, they were running down the street in torn clothes, screaming “Swordfish! Swordfish! Swordfish!”

    Just so y’know.

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